Not Your Mama's Biscuits

One thing I do miss is a good homemade biscuit. And one of the many meals I do miss by my mom is her homemade biscuits. So, me being the adventurous type, I decided to take this task on. Which...is either a good thing, or a bad thing. Well... How do I say this...it ended in epic failure. It felt like I was in an "I Love Lucy Episode" and Murphy (Murphy's Law) was in my kitchen, helping me ever so much. If you want a free laugh (mostly snarky comments and poking fun at myself), do read. However, if you have any suggestions, they are much appreciated.

I had all my ingredients set out, ready to tackle my mom's famous biscuit recipe, and I was confident going into the recipe. It was until I started kneading the dough that I realized something wasn't right. My dough wasn't binding. And on top of that, the flour I used to dust my counter top with was readily absorbed. That should have been my first red flag. But I continued on kneading the dough, thinking it just needed more work. The more I worked it, the dryer it became. And eerily enough, it became reminiscent of art gum eraser (you'll see in the picture below). That really...really should have been the second red flag. But me being optimistic (just look at the title of the blog :D), figured this will work out. All of my cooking has worked out before. But the third red flag should have been my biscuits becoming stuck in the glass. You see, I use a glass like a cookie cutter for biscuits, it's a good way to tell if you have enough air kneaded into the biscuits. When you cut the biscuits, you'll hear a poof sound with some flour dusting in the air. Well, my biscuits decided to poof and lodge themselves in the glass, even after flouring the glass. Luckily, I was able to get the art gum shaped biscuits dislodged and onto the cookie sheet.

The formed biscuits, before oven

But allowing myself the benefit of the doubt, I kept trudging on. Well, I placed the biscuits in the oven, and well...they just became more dry, and didn't look or cook right. (On a side note, always check your oven top to make sure you have no plastic on top. It's just a word of advice). The outside was cooked, but the inside was soft. So, I placed them back in the oven on low heat, still hoping it would help, but alas, nothing could save the poor biscuits.

Post oven carnage

They were crumbling (not the good kind of crumbling), dry, and when you dropped it, it shattered like an antique vase (I dropped a biscuit by accident, and well...you can see from the picture) *sigh*. I forced myself to eat one with a gluten-free veggie patty, with a little Veganase, and that didn't even salvage the taste.

It was reminiscent of heavy gluten free vegan bread. :P (which I gave up a while a go).

I will definitely try again, once I clean the plastic from my stove, pick up the crumbly biscuits from the kitchen, and restore some of my confidence, lol.

And on another side note, I should probably try a different flour. I used soy flour, which may not have been the best idea. And maybe xanithum gum wouldn't be a bad idea either...